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9.17.2007 ||> What would you do?
This morning a male co-worker came over to my desk to tell me about last Friday's happy hour. I usually try to catch the office happy hours because we can usually con our bosses into buying a round. But since I was driving and wanted to get away from work last week, I went home instead.
Apparently, I missed a whole mess of stuff. The highlight, and the reason he wanted to talk to me about it, was that he was sexually harassed by a woman that works with us. Let's call her Nellie (because I like alliteration and Nutty Nellie sort of tickles me).
On Friday, my friend was sitting and talking to the people at the happy hour, when he got sucked into a conversation with Nellie. They had some more to drink, and she started moving closer to him, and rubbing his leg. During their conversation which touched on the sexual, she asked him if he would like to crash at her place. He could sleep "on the couch but if [he wanted] to sleep anywhere else in the apartment [he was] more than welcome to. Really, anywhere [he wanted]." He started to feel really uncomfortable and wanted to get away. Apparently, Nellie was so blatant at one point, that he saw some coworkers, mouths agape, stare outwardly, but she didn't care.
He eventually got her to move on to some other guy, and she gave up on him. When he woke up Saturday, he felt kind of sick and used. I hope telling me made him feel better, but I didn't really know what he should do.
The thing is, if it was a woman, I would say that she should report something like that immediately. It was a totally inappropriate and blatant case of sexual harassment. As far as I'm concerned, Nellie should be fired. However, the issue with something like this is that when it is a man, a situation like this is treated as some sort of joke. Because men being put in an uncomfortable sexual situation is funny... right?
Granted, if this was the opposite situation (a man harassing a woman), the victim would either be blamed for it somehow (what was she wearing? are you sure she wasn't flirting with him?) or have her name dragged through the mud. But with a man, there's the very real possibility that his feelings won't even get a thought or mention and he could very well face ridicule. Being ridiculed at work I feel is not conductive to a healthy workplace and sucks no matter who you are.
So, what should a guy do in this situation? If someone came on to you in a way that made you very uncomfortable, what would you do?
Labels: work
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